bluey_and_siguifreud

muahahah! Toni tagged meee XD

2005-10-19T05:10:03Z

1) Bold what is true about you.
2) Italicize what you wish was true about you.
3) +Add+ one true thing about you to the end of the list.
4) Tag five LJ friends.

* I miss somebody right now.
* I don't watch much TV these days.
* I own lots of books.
* I wear glasses or contact lenses. wierd I know XD
* I love to play video games.
* I've tried marijuana.
* I've watched porn movies.
* I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.
* I believe honesty is always the best policy.
* I curse sometimes.
* I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.
* I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
* I have broken someone's bones. heh... don't ask -_-
* I have a secret that I am ashamed to reveal.
* I hate the rain.
* I'm paranoid at times.
* I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
* I need/want money right now.
* I love sushi.
* I talk really, really fast. sometimes...
* I have fresh breath in the morning.
* I have long hair.
* I have lost money in Las Vegas.
* I have at least one sibling.
* I was born in a country outside of the U.S.
* I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past. sadly
* I couldn't survive without Caller I.D.
* I like the way that I look.
* I have lied to a good friend in the last 6 months.
* I am usually pessimistic.
* I have a lot of mood swings.
* I think prostitution should be legalized. It's not?
* I slept with a roommate.
* I have a hidden talent.
* I'm always hyper no matter how much sugar I have.
* I have a lot of friends.
* I have pecked someone of the same sex.
* I enjoy talking on the phone.
* I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
* I love to shop and/or window shop.
* I'm obsessed with my Xanga or Livejournal.
* I don't hate anyone.
* I'm a pretty good dancer.
* I'm completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother.
* I have a cell phone.
* I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
* I've rejected someone before.
* I currently love someone.
* I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
* I want to have children in the future.
* I have changed a diaper before.
* I've called the cops on a friend before.
* I'm not allergic to anything. i think...
* I have a lot to learn.
* I am shy around the opposite sex.
* I’m online 24/7, even as an away message.
* I have at least 5 away messages saved.
* I have tried alcohol or drugs before.
* I have made a move on a friend's significant other or crush in the past.
* I own the "South Park" movie.
* I have avoided assignments at work/school to be on Xanga or Livejournal.
* I enjoy some country music.
* I would die for my best friends.
* I'm obsessive, and often a perfectionist.
* I have used my sexuality to advance my career.
* Halloween is awesome because you get free candy. XD
* I have dated a close friend's ex.
* I am happy at this moment. At the current time, yes.
* I’m obsessed with guys. lately :S
* Democrat.
* Republican.
* I am punk rockish.
* I go for older guys/girls, not younger.
* I study for tests most of the time.
* I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone I’ve ever met.
* I can work on a car.
* I love my job.
* I am comfortable with who I am right now.
* I have more than just my ears pierced.
* I walk barefoot wherever I can.
* I have jumped off a bridge.
* I love sea turtles.
* I spend ridiculous amounts of money on makeup.
* I plan on achieving a major goal/dream.
* I am proficient on a musical instrument.
* I hate office jobs.
* I went/want to go to college out of state.
* I am adopted.
* I am a pyro.
* I have thrown up from crying too much.
* I have been intentionally hurt by people that I loved.
* I fall for the worst people and have been hurt every time.
* I adore bright colors. in a stupid mentally insane way XD
* I usually like covers better than originals.
* I hate chain theme restaurants like Applebees and TGIFridays. I like Fridays, actually.
* I can pick up things with my toes.
* I can't whistle.
* I have rode/owned a horse.
* I still have every journal I’ve ever written in.
* I talk in my sleep.
* I've often thought that I was born in the wrong century.
* I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distractions.
* I wear a toe ring.
* I have a tattoo.
* I can't stand at LEAST one person that I work(ed) with.
* I am a caffeine junkie.
* I am completely tree-huggy spiritual, and I'm not ashamed at all.
* If I knew I would get away with it, I would commit at least one murder.
* I cosplayed or know what cosplaying is.
* I have been to over 15 conventions.
* I will collect anything, and the more nonsensical, the better.
* I enjoy a nice glass of wine with dinner.
* I'm an artist.
* I am ambidextrous. sometimes
* I sleep with so many stuffed animals, I can hardly fit on my bed.
* If it weren't for having to see other people naked, I'd live in a nudist colony.
* I have terrible teeth.
* I hate my toes.
* I did this Meme even though I wasn't tagged by the person who took it before me.
* I have more friends on the internet than offline.
* I have lived in either three different states or countries.
* I am extremely flexible.
* I love hugs more than kisses.
* I want to own my own business.
* I smoke.
* I spend way too much time on the computer than on anything else.
* Nobody has ever said I'm normal.
* Sad movies, games, fics and the like can cause a trickle of tears every now and then.
* I am proficient in the use of many types firearms and combat weapons.
* I like the way women look in stylized men's suits.
* I don't like it when people are unpleased or seem unpleased with me.
* I have been described as a dreamer or likely to have my head up in the clouds.
* I have played strip poker with someone else before.
* I have had emotional problems for which I have sought professional help.
* I believe in ghosts and the paranormal.
* I can't stand being alone.
* I have at least one obsession at any given time.
* I weigh myself, pee/poo, and then weigh myself again.
* I consistently spend way too much money on obsessions-of-the-moment.
* I'm a judgmental asshole.
* I'm a HUGE drama-queen.
* I have traveled on more than one continent.
* I sometimes wish my father would just disappear.
* I need people to tell me I'm good at something in order to feel that I am.
* I am a Libertarian.
* I can speak more than one language.
* I can fall asleep even if the whole room is as noisy as it can be.
* I would rather read than watch TV.
* I like reading fact more than fiction.
* I have pulled an all-nighter on an assignment I was given a month to do.
* I have no piercings.
* I have spent the night in a train station or other public place.
* I have been so upset over my physical gender that I cried.
* I once spent Christmas completely alone because there was a miscommunication on which parent was supposed to have me that night.
* I've been married and am now divorced.
* There have been times when I have wondered "Why was I born?" and may/may not have cried over it.
* I like most animals better than most people.
* I own a collection of retro games consoles.
* The thought of physical exercise makes me shiver.
* I have hit someone with a dead fish.
* I have written/read erotic stories.
* I am compulsively honest.
* I was born with a congenital birth defect that has never been repaired.
* I have danced topless in front of dozens of complete strangers. And not been ashamed.
* I have gone from wishing I was a boy to reveling in being a girl to feeling like a boy again in the span of five minutes, and not cared a whit for my actual sex.
* I am unashamedly bisexual, and have different motivations for my desires for different genders.
* I sometimes won't sleep a whole night or eat a whole day because I forget to.
* I find it impossible to get to sleep without some kind of music on. depends...
* I dislike milk.
* I obsessively wash my hands.
* I always carry that something significant around with me.
* Sometimes I'd rather wear a wig in day-to-day life than use my own hair.
* I've pushed myself to become more self-aware and thereby more aware of others.
* Even though I live on my own I still cry sometimes because I miss my mother.
* I hand wrote all the HTML tags in this document.
* I've liked something which a majority of people claimed was either bad or weird.
* I have been clinically dead for a brief period of time.
* Instead of feeling sympathy/empathy with people and their problems, I simply become annoyed.
* I am a virgin.
* I participate/have participated in auto drag races and won.
* I do not 'get' most comedy acts.
* I don't think strippers are money-greedy or slutty for dancing.
* I don't like to chew gum.
* I am obsessed with history/historical things and can't wait for someone to build a time machine so I can be the first to use it.
* I can never remember for the life of me where I parked the car.
* Had the TEEN ANGST thing going for at least 2-3 years.
* Wish people would be more empathic and honest with each other.
* I play Dungeons and Dragons weekly.
* I love to sing.
* I want to live in my mother's basement when I grow up.
* I have a custom-built computer.
* I'm Irish. slightly...
* I only have one parent due to either a divorce or death.
* I was born premature by three or more months.
* I'm part Mexicasian.
* My dreams are sometimes so realistic that I have to ask the people I dreamed about if it really happened.
* I like coconuts.
* I am currently role-playing.
* I am convinced that I have created a character who is my true alter-ego.
* I think differently from everyone I know and am often misunderstood/hated because of it.
* I procrastinate often.
* I have used Linux/MacOS on a desktop before, or use it regularly.
* I have a favourite periodic element.
* I have, at one point, watched over 26 consecutive episodes of a favorite anime series.
* I have thought about my future and been afraid of what might happen in it.
* I have written a good song on my own.
* I have wanted to have sex with my gay best friend.

ONE TRUE THING- I constently worry about whats going to happen to me/my family in the coming months.

some of thoughs were eye opening...

me written all over it

2005-10-18T18:19:36Z

How to make a sarai

Ingredients:

5 parts pride

5 parts silliness

3 parts instinct

Method:
Stir together in a glass tumbler with a salted rim. Serve with a slice of wisdom and a pinch of salt. Yum!

Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.com

blah

2005-10-09T02:10:43Z

The last week or two I've been sick. It really sucks. My friend also told Adam that I liked him (stupidstupid) and now I'm even more skitish around him then ever. Maybe I already posted this somewheresss... oh well. Tomorrow I have a rodeo ^^ KG and jet are both running, and I'm still in the running for hte 4-d saddle. I hope the lady ahead of me doesn't show up *evil laughter*. I think I have a new friend, who is a boy, not a boyfriend but a friend who is a boy. Hopefully that was clear enough for you. His name is Michael and he actually taks to me, makes me feel so spehshooollll lol ^^ and he has a horse, and he ropes, he is a cowboy through and through, and he is hot as heck ^^ So now I'm torn between two ropers, Adam and Michael. Pretty pathetic isn't it? I'll update this later, I have relatives spending the night... again... damn hurricanes >_< so yeah, adios.

Story

2005-09-28T21:44:51Z

Yes, I think I finaly have my story idea that I've been searching for forever. Right now I'm gunnna have to chew on it, because it's just a big jumble of stuff. Meh, I'll update this later, I'm tired and it's a sweltering 105 out her in the lone star state. Oh yes, Siguifreud is enjoying a golden eagle form at the moment, witch is pretty to see him in ^_^

woot

2005-09-28T01:47:34Z

The weekend was GREAT!

I won reserve champion in my rodeo group over the weekend, and I roped as well. I didn't catch any cows but I still got a buckle, and I ran all my patterens without knocing anything down! KG did a great job, and I'm very proud of her, I will post some pictures at the bottoms of this entry. Everyone got a prize I think, and it was funny because after the rodeo my friend Breanna told Adam I was twelve, so now he thinks I'm a twelve year old instead of a fourteen year old XXXDDD.

It was sad, having to go to school, but I got to ride on monday and today on my young horse Jet, that was really enjoyable. My grandparents are heading this way now, because Beaumont is a mess, and the street they live on has a gas leakage somewhere, so they will be with us for a while, witch puts me on the floor... but It's for family I 'spose.

I'm looking forward to my birthday this friday when I official become fourteen, so I'm excited. Me and my grandmother can celebrate together because her birthday is the next day. The week has been great so far, I'm passing spanish and science and math! IM SO HAPPY! *jumps* And Siguifreud is having fun changing forms, he was a silver canandian lynx, then white, and then he was a gemsbok, then a song thrush, I think he is taking to TDF damians daemon's *laughs*

Anyway, I might update this but fo now here are some pictures, the bay horse is KG and the big fat paint horse is roy ^_^

http://www.sutphoto.com/outside_events/clayman05/pages/bbt_205.htm
http://www.sutphoto.com/outside_events/clayman05/pages/bbt_319.htm
http://www.sutphoto.com/outside_events/clayman05/pages/bbt_274.htm
http://www.sutphoto.com/outside_events/clayman05/pages/bbt_103.htm

rants, rants, and more rants. oh, did I forget rants?

2005-09-21T21:37:35Z

This week has been a complete pain in the butt. I got there late yesterday, and my mom got all pissed off at me for not riding the bus. I didn't want to because there are weird people on my bus, and they freak me out. She gets all pissed of yelling snd screaming, and then I start yelling because my dad as he leaves nearly runs over my fricking cat! So they both start yelling bloody murder at me and say go wash your face and quit crying. I wasn't crying I was sobbing my frawking eyes out. Just goes to show how much of a dumb ass I am eh?

School wasn't any better. My teachers get all mad at me and crap. Like today the counsler said no going down the sixth grade hallways. Well news flash beatch, MY FLUCKING LOCKERS IN THAT DAMN HALLWAY!!!!! She makes us all walk a half mile around the building to get to our lockers, when I could have just walked down a hallway. It's not like I'm going to beat up some sixth grader, I mean, come one.

My brain is on fire and my head hurts, homework is stacked way up into the clouds. I hate school I HATE DAMN SCHOOL! It's making my life more of a hell hole then it already is and thats not really what I want right now. The only thing I was looking forward to was the Clayman Rodeo this weekend, I was going to ride in it. But no. The hurricane has to pop out of no where and ruin my whole weekend. I hate it. It seems every thing is getting worse and worse as the days go by. What the hell did I do?

Man, now I sound like a whiny kid don't I? Sorry if I do, don;t mean to piss any one of, it's just nice to rant about your... well, problems I guess. Tune in next time...

meh...

2005-09-19T05:26:55Z

Damn... I'm so tired. I can't sleep. I can't think. Something must be wrong with me, I just don't know what. I need to go to bed. But screw it...
Me and KG (my new horse) did well today at the rodeo, she one me some money, and so did my young horse jet... so that was cool. I saw Adam again today, and he was a little nicer. I think his parents know I like him, because whenever they see me, they're all like "hi!!!". It's a little odd. Sig and me are just... tired, tired, tired. I need a shot of sugar... or something. Meh. Well thats about it. It's 12:30 and yeah... I have school tomorrow. By the way, don't mind my pointless rambling. I just feel like crap. Hopefully something good will happen tomorrow... At least I get to go to my roping lessons.

The Clayman Rodeo is this coming weekend, I'm excited, really, even though I'm not at the present. I'm sleep deprived is all. I can't wait to run KG and rope off of Roy. It should be lots of fun. Oh yesh, that rodeo today put me in the running for a saddle, yessir, a saddle. Some lady has more points then me though so I need to hurry it up. I miss my puppy... she's outside, with my big dog Toby, but I miss her... Sig keeps me company though, and sometimes I pretend he is lying next to me (well he is..) and I can feel him, and he is soft and warm. I feel safe... secure... I wish I felt secure all the time. Yup, ok... bed time now I suppose. I might edit this later. Ciao.

isn't life wonderful...

2005-09-16T21:45:57Z

This week has sucked major ASS. Pardon me french. Anyway, me and Sig have had a name change. He went from Apollo to Siguifreud. Don't ask... well... ask if you really want to but whatever. This week has been horrible. I went from thinking the boy Adam (the guy I liked) liked me, to now thinking he hates me. I swear I saw him talking to his sister, and they were watching me. I just hoped on my horse and ran away as fast as I could. He didn't even wave to me the other day when he drove by in his truck... Then on top of that my grades are falling, and my teachers are all being FRAWKING ARSE HOLES!

I was reading a book, and the teachers was giving an etremely boring lecture and all of a sudden she takes it from me, and throws it as hard as she can on her desk. It wasn't even my book! I was so FRAWKING pissed off that me and Sig had a very good rant in his little note book that we call "Siguifreuds Note Book", and it's so very original. SO I home looking for some parental emotional support and my mom ask's me if I finish my homework. I say "no, I'll do it in the morning." and then she starts getting all pissed off about my grades and saying if I don't bring 'em up I can screw riding my mare. The one I just got.

I finish and cry myself to sleep for about an hour. Boy wasn't that a fun week...
I guess my life is just crap right now. I don't know what's going on, Siggeh tries his best to cheer me up but right now we are both depressed. DEPRESSED! And no one seems to notice. My friends don't care, my parents don't care. You think parents would understand. But noooooo they have to be all bitchy about it. I should go do somethign stupid. Be back later. Oh how I hate my life...

Great Day... kinda

2005-09-12T01:54:58Z

Today was a good day I suppose. We were going to go to a race today, but the rain canceled it so that was a major bummer. (rodeo race) So we went to church instead, and I got really fidgity or however yo spell that. Otherwise it was all good. We finally got out, and we went to the mall to pay bills, shope, all that crap. Then we went out to the barn! But when we get there we remember we have to go out and pass around some posters for our farm rodeo that next weekend. So we did that, then we got to ride.

I rode Roy first. He is a sorrelt paint horse, and an overo. Then I got to ride my new horse! I was so excited, and my friend was there. Another girl named brooke was there to and she might get a horse as well, that would be three bays out in the pasture. That made us all laugh. K.G., the new horse, did ok. We walked most of the time, then trotted. I tried a lope but she got a little hyper so we went back down to a walk. I just had fun being out there with her though, and I can;t wait to ride her in a race this coming weekend.

Now I'm home, sadly. If I could I would stay out at the barn. The only good thing I'm looking forward to is seeing Adam at the barn tomorrow. We have roping lessons around the same time, his class is right after mine and he watches us finish up. I feel so special when he says hi to me, I must be such a weirdo... It's bed time though now, so yeah. I might edit this later. Adios!
AND THANK YOU to those who replied to my last entry. I'm glad someone is reading these ^^

HOLY CRAP!

2005-09-11T01:27:24Z

My parents bought me a horse!!!!

We were going out to these lady's farm, and her husband's, to try out a horse named KG. We wanted to see what she would do when she ran poles and strait away barrels. Those are rodeo events for those of you who don't know. Anyway, we brought my young horse up to their place, and rode him some before I hopped on KG to work her. We finished up, and we gave her a bath, and Jet, me horse, a shower to. We were about to leave, and I walked over to tell KG good bye, and before I could the lady had slapped her on the butt and she had hopped right into are trailer!

I was confused, and so I was like "huh???...!!!!!!!!!" because about five seconds later it clicked to me that we were taking her home. Or, well, to the barn were we boared. It was great, the lady and her husband cried, I cried, my parents cried and my brother was like "were taking that home?". I cracked up after watching the film, because he called KG that. We all went out to eat, and we talked. It was really sad when we finally left, because I know they will miss KG alot. But I'm so happy now! I have a pro rodeo horse!!!

We drove an hour all the way back to the farm were we board, and my friend Breanna was there. We all watched KG, and I walked her around the place so she could get a feel for it. We put her in her stall, and she met Strawberry, who is a sour mare. They kicked it up a little but it was nothing serious. I didn't want to leave, but my parents insisted I go home because they wanted to watch the football game. Oh well, I'll see her tomorrow bright and early, and I just can't wait!

Over it and onto something new.

2005-09-10T11:51:58Z

I've liked this guy for a long time, and I'm finally over him! We grew up together, and now it's just kinda a stupid thing. We used to be friends but we hardly say thnigs to each other any more. So that was that. I've met a boy out at the farm were I ride, and he talks to me and he is very sweet. Even though he is two years older then me I really like him, so I'm hoping somehow are relationship will grow. We don't see each other alot so I try to go out to farm as much as I can now, it's funny if you think about it...

Apollo was really funny, I had a bad day, and he was talking to me, and he said something along the lines of, "what if I turned into that boy you like?". That made me laugh. So we talked about that some, me and him. Later that day we had to go to the farm for flag practice, were we carry flags around on are horses, and he was there! He was practicing the rodeo clown act with the farms owners son, and it was really cute. Him, his dad, and a few other men who work out there were the "backup crew". And damn does he look good in sun glasses. He talked to me to, commented on the "cowgirls" routine, but he directly looked at me. And he even offered to take the flag from me when we had to put them up. He doesn't ignore me like the other boy I used to like did. So I think this is going to be something... good or bad. Preferably good though 0o.

That rodeo we went to last week, me and Breanna did great, we had so much fun! All of my young horses runs were clean, except on the last. Which means we didn't hit any of the three barrels. The last run was going great, until my horse got caught up in the moment and rushed the third barrel, slamming my leg into it... oh well, just another trophy to add to all the other scars. It was a good weekend considering. We ran consitantly in the seventeens. That was his best Jurassic Classic ever.

Well, It's 6:45 in the morning, so I need to go back to sleep. Today we're going out to see KG again, a mare we have been looking at. So I need to get off before my mom finds me... or my dad. So anywho, good night all! Apollo says bye, because I won't let him say what he really wants.

HAPPY!

2005-09-01T04:01:28Z

Wooohooo! Tomorrow me and my friend Breanna get to leave early for a rodeo. The Jurassic Classic. I'm still up and it's really late. We plan to tease a friend of ours, ditch him, and bring boxers to the show and were them on our head because every time he runs he rips his boxers oO.
I feel sorry for him in a way, but yeah whatever. I will probably be up all night. Apollo is excited to, but tired. He was a white tiger the whole day today, and now I think he is a bengal again but I can't really see him. So I'm going to go find some more bengal pictures, that might help.
Yeah so I'm off to bed. See you people laters.

early early

2005-08-31T12:28:48Z

My dad woke me up early, to early for school >_< but oh well what is a kid to do. School was torture yesterday, it was so noisy, and we didn't get home till late because I had to ride in two lessons out at the barn. Then we went to see my aunts new house even though it was 9:00 at night, but I guess I didn't considering she is my favorite aunt. Apollo was with me all the time though, and yesterday he actually kept a form for a ful day and he is still a white tiger. I don't know if it's me or him but hei has taken a liking to the big cats. Sometimes I think he has a morning and afternoon form. But gah, off I go to school. Not that I want to. I think the only thing worth going for is the fact I get out tmrw afternoon and I don't have to come on friday. Yay for four day weekedends.

bluey_and_appy @ 2005-08-28T21:27:00

2005-08-29T02:32:43Z

Apollo decided he wanted to sprout wings tonight ^^ I think it makes him look very devilish. Mmmm, I have a friend who won't believe in daemons though, and another who got mad at me for trying to talk to her about it because her so called "voice" disappeared for some reason. I'm thinking Khar (who is her voice) might be her death, but he never liked me much so I guess I won't talk about it. I think Stephles will be more understanding. Ookami-kun can be... angry at times, I just want to strangle her. Meh. But I have 3 peeps (2 who are half so that counts as one) who are actually interested in this! I'm so excited, and I'm gunna try to spread the word as much as I can, and to people I trust. I know Appy is real because I used a pendelum to find him ^^ it worked and It started moving once I imagined him by more or on my bed. It was fun. This has been a good weekend. I can't wait to bring Apollo to school, it will be different, but I think it'll be fun.

I really should go to bed, but I might update tonight if I forget to write something. I'm feeling kinda disgruntled about my friends, but I think something good will come from it in the end. Good night!

Sleepiness

2005-08-28T18:20:47Z

Hmmmm... I stayed up late last night. Appy is a tiger this morning, so pretty. He says he wishes I would call him handsome instead but whatever. Mrrrr... allergies have been killing me all week, but Ithink I'm getting better even though I cough and hack non-stop.

Appy- how is that getting better?

Hey, I'm trying ok? I was worse during the week. Yeah but now I'm tired, sleepy yeah. I want to do something. We've been on the forum all morning so I should really go eat something but I'm lazy... mrrrrr. I guess that's all for now and I'll post some more later.

My Daemon.

2005-08-28T08:33:05Z

Hi, this is my first ever journal entry, and it's Apollo's to. Apollo is my Daemon, and right now he enjoys his tiger, black wolf dog, and panther forms ^^. He came with me to a rodeo, and he had fun jumping on peoples cars. He was sleeping on my friends car in his panther form, it was funny because his paws were draped over the roof of the car and he was black on white... so yeah. He spend most of the time as a big black dog though... and he didn't like the scream music concert that was going on next to the rodeo arena so that scared him. He says he hated it, poor dear. *pets appy* well... yeah ok I guess I will add more later.